Over the past several weeks, I have had some unusual things happen that have led me to this idea. The happenings were not unusual in the sense of UFOs or that sort of thing. In fact, they were somewhat mundane in the scope of things. But it's the way they happened that drew my attention.
Basically what happened is that I let go. I was engaged in something (planning, cooking, doing, activity) and in the course of it all, I stopped and realized that I was feeling some anxiety perhaps over the outcome. What happened that was odd is that in a lot of cases, I also managed - somehow - to recognize that I could let go, let it simply happen, not worry or fret about the result or outcome. And then what happened was.... nothing. It all worked.
The various happenings, while not ones that, had the result gone wrong, resulted in something really serious, were complicated. In one case (just today) there was certainly a possibility of dangerous outcome (I could conceivably gotten hurt badly if I had missed or made a mistake). But they worked. In essence, everything turned out fine.
I recall at the first one, I was simply pleasantly surprised (it was a complicated dinner). The second one (VERY tight airline connections) left me well, breathless? Amazed? And it was somewhere in between I hit on this idea of 'The Goddess Will Provide'. I have no idea where I first heard it. I think it was from a dear friend. But I recall that I first was... skeptical. I'm not one to take a lot of woo woo stuff as a road to truth. But I was .... challenged by the fact that these things happened.
Then I realized something important: that idea, the goddess will provide, has NOTHING to do with goddesses or divine intervention or anything like that. It has EVERYTHING to do with a belief in myself. And not simply a case of "I can do this" or "I'm worthy" or "I'm good enough". It's more than that. It's about trust. It's about learning to trust myself. To trust that I somehow can and will get through something and it will work out. IT may not be the way I expected, planned or even wanted, but it somehow works itself out. It's an ability, I think, to let myself go to the point of knowing that something in me, in conjunction with others and other events and things, will resolve.
It's sobering.
